I AM NOT YOUR NEGRO

I have a name. My parents chose my title using the names of my maternal grandmother and my paternal grandfather. It's not a hashtag nor is it an antecedent of any negative connotations. However, it's hard not to ask the question, "why?" I mean, as a 30-year-old black man, it's sometimes difficult to grasp the idea that others my age, and younger, had their lives cut short or significantly altered, or at any moment my name could become a spraypainted t-shirt. In the last month alone, I have gleaned news of at least 5 "negroes" dying, either naturally or by force. This is not a new narrative of "negroes," however. In 1931, nine black teenagers were falsely accused of raping two white women aboard a train near Scottsboro, Alabama. They became known as 'The Scottsboro Boys.' These boys would spend anywhere from eight to seventeen years imprisoned...yes for a falsely accused rape. Sound familiar? The Central Park Five? The Groveland Four? Emmett Till? For decades, "negroes" have had to conform to identity in order to protect themselves and fulfill expectations. What we fail to discuss, however, is how "negroes," ask other "negroes" to abide by specified parameters as not to cause attention, uncomfortably, or even shame. Why does my life have to be categorized? Why do "negroes" have to check boxes in order to appease an imaginary tier of false ideologies? James Baldwin stated, “There are days in this country when you wonder what your role in this country is and your place in it. How precisely are you going to reconcile yourself to your situation here and how you are going to communicate to the vast, heedless, unthinking, cruel majority that you are here?" My questioning "why" is the same reconciliation James is referring to. How are we coexisting in harmony when we don't take the time to know each other? To call them by name? Do you wonder why a man can be elected to an office that represents freedom and unity but cause confusion and division? Maybe you've pondered why school systems and healthcare continue to fail distinct neighborhoods and communities? It's because people are looking for their own "negroes." They're own imaginative friend who won't talk back, or be fitter, or have a better job and wealth, or be happier and at peace. The gag is, though, I refuse. I am not your negro. I am who my parents titled me. I am who my ancestors prayed and fought for. I will not be a statistic to feed the minds of some and place fear in others. I decline to fit the mold of social media, family, or the judgy cashier or waitress. So many names will not get the opportunity to be called because of the desire to have "negroes." I say, Be Black! Be Gay! Be Conservative! Be an Instagram model! Be whoever you want to be, except a negro!